Pizza Freak of the Week - Andrew Shaffer (Grayslake, IL)

Andrew Shaffer, Pizza lover and true patriot.

Not a day goes by that someone, somewhere, stands in the aisle of the frozen pizzas at their local grocery store and stares endlessly at the options, debating which to purchase and why. Well, waste no more time Pizza Freaks! Our friend Andrew in Illinois sent in an argumentative write up of what he believes to be the supreme frozen pizza and why. Examining price, flavor, and all things good in the pizza world, Andrew weighs in on one of the most timeless debates of our age, and his answer may surprise you! Read more here!








I consider myself a connoisseur of pizza. While some people count the streaks of their wine as it sinks back to the bottom of the glass, I analyze pizza. The texture, thickness, sauce quality, and density are all factors I examine in my research. It’s common for my group of friends and I to argue about the best frozen pizza on the market. I have slaved away on countless nights trying and find the right frozen pizza and winner of my taste buds affections. In my heated discussion with friends, the main points of debate include taste and price. I believe I have found the perfect pizza to suggest to my friends. The winner of my frozen food love goes to none other than Tombstone’s garlic bread pizza. Given the criteria of taste and price, I am ready to make my case.

Seeing as my friends don’t have high grossing jobs and are still in college, price is a very big deal in frozen pizza selection. Sure, if money wasn’t a factor, then I would be standing by a different pizza (Freschetta, for those curious pizza fans), but alas, money plays its part. Opponents of my pizza selection would say that there are cheaper pizzas than Tombstone’s price of $3.50. I would argue that the only reason those pizzas are cheaper than that is due to the low, low cost of cardboard. You can absolutely find a pizza for around two bucks. However, I’m sure you would rather spend the extra dollar to save yourself from the unrelenting torment the cheaper pizza will wreak on your stomach. Tombstone’s garlic bread pizza sits at the lower end of the price range. I have seen frozen pizzas go as high as 7 dollars. On a college student income (or lack thereof), $3.50 is a downright bargain.


Not only is it a great deal for your wallet, it is also a great deal for your taste buds. When choosing a frozen pizza on the basis of flavor, there is no reason to be frugal. Tombstone’s garlic bread pizza kicks your tongue in its ignorant face. Some may say, “Well, I was just overwhelmed by the flavor of garlic.” Garlic, in itself, is a very potent flavor. Restaurants constantly use garlic as a mainstay in delicious dishes. When you order the Garlic Chicken at any restaurant, you expect the garlic flavor to be prevalent. If you don’t want this tiny vegetable (nope, it’s not a spice) to pop up and slap you, then perhaps garlic isn’t for you. However, the flavor engineers at Tombstone anticipated this dilemma. Yes, when you take your first bite of this pizza you will immediately notice the garlic flavor, but the taste of garlic centers more at the center of the pizza. Therefore, as you near the end of each slice, the intensity lessens until you reach the crisp crust, where your taste buds can recover from the shell shock of flavor they just went through.


We have a wide selection of great frozen pizzas to choose from. It can be frightening to push your rickety shopping cart down the pizza isle, hunched over, embarrassed, not knowing which frozen pizza you will choose. Rest easy, friend. Tombstone’s garlic bread pizza will calm your nerves.


-Andrew Shaffer, 2014